i wonder....

Defeated.

I usually dun feel this way but when it comes to love I become weak, I’ve been trying to find the right words to say but this has been the hardest… an I’m still lost….

Looking back, I wonder if I had made the right decision,I wonder if the sleepless night was worth it, or the endless tears would wash away hurts that could never heal; I wonder if I skipped my meals would anyone notice that I am alright?

I wonder if religion is important? That people would spend time understanding it, I wonder if my faith is strong, that its enough to overcome the past and courage to move on? I wonder if I am able to breathe new life to my soul ?

I wonder if there is a program to install love? or to make someone human? I wonder if ever I was given a chance, would I do it again or would I do something different? I wonder…

Bac home with love

I’ve been having dinner without the person that I adore for the very past few days, and as time flies, the days had turn to weeks and I’ve always hated when we are separated for a long time. Long time for me means more than a week, I dun care if u think I’m crazy or others think that a week is still tolerable because for me it is not.

And yesterday was a very bad day for me, I did call him to tell that I was pretty much quite sick with work, and my lady boss is jus breathing down my neck as the exhibition days approach.. there were so many stuff to follow up especially when handover list and so many stuff she wanna change here n there. I jus need to get done. Yes, I complained over the phone and I needed attention and I needed him over , if its possible, to comfort me , to hug me, to make me feel better….of course there were worst problem that he was facing at work because he had explained that he was gonna be busy during this time of the month. But it still didn’t stop me from complaining and sulking to him.

“ you know what? I’ll take the next flight home”

“ what? Why….? I tot u haf work ??”

“ perhaps you would feel better …..i’ll see you in the evening then…take care baby”

That was the sweetest thing…

Mat tow tak....

Ever since I was angry with B for several days, he has not taken any initiative to make me happy….or perhaps I’m too stubborn to be happy in front of him….B is a person that I care about but I will blog about him another time k?

recently, he had given me a letter …consisting of three coupons cutely drawn and sign by him…. Which I find rather cute and charming..

I find myself staring at the coupons, giggling and trying to make full use of the coupons that B had gave me......
I’ve been given three coupons by B to use with no expiry date and no limit.
Well the coupons given and drawn by him is called “ mat tow tak”..meaning?...anything also can….
It can be use for anything …
For a holiday
For a Back rub
For a handbag
For a car
For being my driver
For a house…waaa seh…..not possible la….

I think the list can go on,

I wonder why he didn’t give me one instead ??
could it be possible to request for unlimited mat tow tak with the one coupons I have…..?

That would be total awesome ness!!

What do u think ? what should I do with the coupons?

Remembering you for who you are!

I was down with flu and fever,as I sip the hot milo, I remembered you;

How you would come to comfort me when I’m not well,

How you would cover me with the sheets jus to keep me warm, and you would make me a cuppa of anything hot..yes, I would love to have that….to be embraced by you even though you know that I’m sick, it feels good….

to be loved;

to be hugged;

to be kissed at the forehead assuring me that i will be okay;

“ hey, what are you daydreaming about?” my mum broke my thoughts....my reminiscence

i saw my reflection in my coffee; and the reflection turn into yours; i see you...
i see your smile;
i see you assuring me again;

i stir the coffee with the spoon i held with my thumb; the reflection has gone,

in reality

Nothing stays the same now, everything has change,

For now and also for the future,

the coffee that i drank is half full ; or half empty

whatever you want it to be;

because it has always been your calling;

i could only wish the best to you because you always had, and will always be!

My emo days are coming bac!

Yes, life pretty sucks these few days , apart from dating, I really have no idea where my life is heading towards now.. I’m in a dilemma where my passion is still for property and whether I should really pursue it.

On the other hand, I’m dying for a break, perhaps an escape island to the tropical beach where mobile phone doesn’t exist!

City life making me mad and I wanna go home ( sing along Michael buble song)

Ok, I’m geetin emo now, so when I’m not so emo I will give a good post!

Chiaoz!